Two Hollywood Phonies (@autumn)

During Kendrick Lamar’s Super Bowl show

Kendrick Lamar: PROBABLY A-

Crowd: MINOOOORRR

The crowd goes crazy as Kendrick continues rapping fast

Travis Kelce looks to the stage wiping a tear

Travis Kelce: I’m Travis Kelce…

Kendrick sweats and looks to the crowd while panting

Kendrick: I got a special guest left for yall…

The crowd goes quiet waiting for the guest

Kendrick: Everyone… Welcome…

The earth shakes and a hole rips open to the depths of hell and a scream gets louder

???: I like to beat pregnant women!

XXXTentacion flies up from hell and joins Kendrick on stage

X: Yo Dot, I got you!

Kanye tears up while watching on TV

Kendrick: You ready?

X: Yeah!

Kendrick: MUUSSSSTARRRRD

Kendrick goes crazy as X stands there in silence

X: Mustard? Heh… What’s a Mustard?

Kendrick approaches X

Kendrick: I get you’re all SAD! but Bitch Don’t Kill My Vibe…

X nods and starts rapping with Kendrick and they go crazy sicko mode style on the mics

Kendrick: DAMN. That was crazy…

The curtains draw and they head backstage

Kendrick: Wow that was crazy!

Kendrick wipes the sweat off his face with a towel and throws it to the side

X: Yeah, that was a good one Dot!

Kendrick: Couldn’t have done it without you!

X: How do you know what to play? Aren’t you scared?

Kendrick: I just have a lot of good music y’know

X: Good music? Heh… What’s a good music?

Kendrick sees X is upset and walks up to him and strokes his cheek

Kendrick: Don’t be so down, you had some good music

X: Not as good as you…

Kendrick blushes

Kendrick: giggles Are you flirting with me?

X: blushes Flirting? Heh… What’s a flirting?

Kendrick: This.

Kendrick leans up and kisses X, and the two fall back on the couch

X: going down!

Kendrick: GOD. DAMN. i FEEL. YAH.

X giggles as he looks down to his bulge poking Kendrick

X: whoa!

The two continue kissing as X starts kissing and sucking on Kendrick’s neck

Kendrick: Mmmm papi… purrs

X: I don’t even speak spanish lol

Kendrick leans up and whispers into X’s ear giggling

X: Anal? Heh… What’s a anal?

Kendrick grins dropping his pants and bending down

X: Oh…

The door opens

Lil Wayne: I can’t believe it! This was meant to be my sho-

Kendrick & X look to Lil Wayne awkwardly

Lil Wayne: I missed out on the Bowl, but I’m not missing this train!

Kendrick & X grab Lil Wayne by each arm and drag him toward them

Lil Wayne: Imma suck it like a Lollipop!

The three get freaky as Travis Kelce walks past the open door and peeks inside

Travis Kelce: I’m Travis Kelce.